A fashion column for the fashion challenged guy

Draco Malfoy

It’s springtime, which means warmer weather, baseball, the end of college basketball and the start of the NBA playoffs. For us fashionable guys, it means one thing: we need to get our spring outfits together. But don’t panic, because I have provided some surefire fashion tips for the remaining few months of the semester.

The key to any post-February outfit is shorts. Any shorts will do, but to make the best spring splash on campus, guys should go one of two ways; Anchor Blue or Interstate jean shorts that extend at least two inches beyond the knee or shorts that have at least six pockets. The latter are known as cargo shorts and in addition to being very fashionable are quite useful, able to hold any small to medium sized square object such as a wallet, CD or Capri Sun juice pouch.

As for a top to go with the cargos or the jean shorts, that depends on the occasion. For more casual get togethers or just going to class, you can’t go wrong with a shirt from a professional sports team. And I am not talking “Football Western Division three-time champs” T-shirts here; instead strictly attire from one of the three major professional U.S. sports leagues (hockey excluded). If the shirt indicates in some fashion that it is authentic apparel, you are headed in the right direction.

For special occasions or when you are trying to make a good impression, a shirt with a collar is a must. But not a polo – a jersey.

That’s right, sports jerseys are not just for the athletes that actually play, and they still work even if the team is out of season. All jerseys are good, but the bigger and more colorful the better. Good examples here include Denver Nuggets throwbacks from the 80s or any variety of NFL alternate jerseys. Be careful, though – it is important to make sure that the distance between the bottom of the jersey and the bottom of the shorts is not less that six inches. It’s a jersey, not a dress.

But whether a jersey or a T-shirt – the only two options above the waist – matching is key. While this is easily achieved with the above short selections, this can be challenging when coupled with a hat or the other staple, basketball shorts. A black, fitted New Era hat is pretty neutral and goes with just about anything. Just don’t mix teams, even if they are from the same city. That means no Padres hats with a Kobe jersey. Shell out the extra $30 for a Lakers cap or a Padres shirt. That extra effort will surely get noticed.

Now for footwear. It’s all about white shoes; quality kicks include K-Swiss or the classic Nike lowtop. One problem that comes with the white shoes is that cutting across grass is no longer an option; gotta keep them fresh. And nothing goes better with white shoes than black socks – not the ones your local mailman sports, but ankle socks. Did I forget to mention sandals? No, unless you are going to or coming from the beach or taking out your trash.

Since Linda Vista is close to the ocean, those breezes can creep up and freeze out even the boldest short wearer. This is especially problematic for those that have 7:45 or 8 a.m. classes. Breakaway pants are not an option unless the temperature dips below 45, but there is a solution: the track jacket. Needs to be loose and the fabric should be polyester. If you don’t know what polyester is, spill a drink on the potential jacket. If it beads up, you have found a winner. Don’t get too crazy with the colors; the jacket will be worn a lot and needs to be versatile.

For those looking to stay fly in the springtime, just follow the above steps. If your popularity and number of dates suddenly increase, though, you have officially been warned.